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Boomerang 2

Another thing I feel that travels at a fast pace apart from light is sight. I caught a quick glimpse of him from afar, he walked through the crowd lazily in a flowing gown, a mean-looking man, he made a suspicious movement then pulled out a .44 magnum revolver. The speakers were blaring with Chief Obiogbolu's speech. In a swift stunt, he aimed it at Chief and fired.

I dived for my boss and rolled him over on his stomach. I felt his body quake, fear had breathed over him. We laid faced down for a while till the shootings stopped as the law enforcement agents fired shots back at the armed man.

When you are the rabbit that a tiger desires for lunch, the best option for you is to disappear into your burrow. We took the next flight to Lagos. It was obvious that the northerners didn't accept the True Nigerian Party (TNP).

The wonder about being an influential person's guard is that apart from material rewards, you also get to move around a lot. We had just returned from a trip to Johannesburg. Chief Obiogbolu couldn't afford to stay out of Nigeria for long considering the fact that the elections were fast approaching. In as much as Nigeria had its demons chasing her around, it still felt good to breathe in fresh air on home soil.

I sat with my boss at his favorite spot in his garden, under the coconut tree.

"Tom! If you had a way of taking out revenge on a political foe for an offense he committed long ago, will you do it?", he almost startled me. My mind had drifted to the list of things I had to pick up from the mall.

I cleared my throat. "I am not a politician, sir",my husky voice reminded him.

He chuckled, "Ok! Put yourself in my shoes"

"Well when one is mean to me, it is certain that they have just picked the role of playing my victim", I said in a calm tone.

"Hmmm..... Even when they have apologized?", he pestered.

"I knew I was not in the position to answer your question,sir. It depends on the offense but mind you, there are men who can't be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with",I informed him.

He took a deep breathe and exhaled. "I learnt a new thing during the peace summit at Johannesburg, something about an eye for an eye makes the world blind, the speaker said it was highly practiced by Mahatma Ghandi. I will start practicing it with this old foe" , he concluded and sipped from his glass.

"Its a good thing", I smiled and slipped my hands in pockets.

"By the way,I remain grateful to you for saving my life during the campaign"

"Oh! That's why I am being paid,sir",I said and shrugged.

"You don't seem to make a lot of eye contact, do you?",he asked.

I touched my beards probably ransacking it for the answer to Chief's question.

"Darling! Lunch is ready", her sing-song voice distracted us.

She walked through the porch into the garden in her majestic gait. Her hips swayed with grace, her long hair struggled to kiss her cheeks as the mild breeze blew, her lips were well carved and red colored as if she had applied a Mac lipstick. Her light-skinned complexion could make her pass for a mulatto. How the hell did such a lady in her twenties get married to Chief who just clocked sixty eight?

My eyes carried out a good scan on her. I was no longer surprised that their marriage was forced one, she was the payment for a loan, her old father could not pay. Chief had eyes for beautiful light-skinned damsels and she was not an exception. So began the story of beauty and the beast, I guess.

"My jewel, let's head inside then", Chief replied as he stood up to join her.

"Won't Tom join us?", she asked

"No! I have something to do", I lied

"Please, I insist even if its a spoon", she pleaded.

"How can a big man like him eat just a spoon? Women sef eeeehhhhnnn", Chief chuckled.
We laughed along with him as we strolled into the main house. Chief would have made a good comedian if he didn't find himself behind the walls of politics.


I sat with the gate man, Shehu as I listened to his stories of how he had escaped during the Islamic crisis in Onitsha.

"Wallahi Oga Tom! Na Allah save me. I don tell am por Allah say I don dey come back por my prayer.... The Ibo guys I catch me tell me say in the name op the fada", he narrated.

My inquisition increased "...and what did you reply?"

"...and op the mother and op the brodas and sisters",he cried.

I laughed out loudly. "Shehu, you are hilarious. It is in the name of the father and of the son and of the holy spirit"

"Wahllahi, I be like say I no like me. I answer me quick so that I no go kill me, I no matter weda I correct or I no correct",he told me.

I clutched my chest as I laughed, Shehu was a clown. I turned around and Bola, the maid was standing by my side.

"Sir! Madam said she wants to see you", she passed her information. "I will be with her shortly", I assured her as I tried hard not to choke from my laughter.

"Shehu, my man. I dey come. Make I see madam", I tapped his shoulders and walked into the house.

She relaxed her amazing body on the brown cushioned settee. As I walked in, she turned around with a smile.

 "I just hope you won't be annoyed. The gas cylinder is leaking and the nozzle seems not to be well attached. I called the repair man but he said he is stuck in traffic, could you please help out?", she pleaded.

Wow! Beauty and humility. It was a rare combination for a woman.

I smiled. "Show me the cylinder"

We walked into kitchen and I rolled my sleeves to get the cylinder fixed.

"I find guys who roll their sleeves hot", I turned around to be sure she had made the statement. I gulped down saliva and pretended not to have heard her.

"Plier?", I inquired.

"Cabinet", she replied.

I checked through the cabinet and grabbed the red-handled plier. I tightened the screw and turned the knob on the cylinder. It was perfect. No more leakage! As I washed my hands and turned around, I felt her arms grip me from behind.

 A leer danced around her lips and her eyes ready to break the firm walls of defense of even mighty Samson.

"You don't seem to notice when a woman needs you", she cooed. I felt like a Nollywood super hero. Well, I already knew the script so I played along. Most wives of wealthy men had the tendency of being silly.

 Our eyes locked in a gaze. The earth seemed to stop spinning round its axis. I lowered my head and we locked lips. I tried to pull away but she pulled me in the more. I smiled and disengaged myself from her hold.

She looked displeased, "Why did you stop?"

"Ma'am! I don't think this is right", I told her with confidence.

"Why? I have waited and longed for this moment. Or are you the 21st century Joseph who is scared of ......"

"Potiphar,I presume", Chief chipped in as he stepped in unannounced.


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"He just had to go", I yelled inside of me. Dele was too bossy and proud,the rest of the staff looked up to me to ensure he was fired. All I had to do was pull the manager into my seductive web and by morning, Dele would get his termination letter. Anyone who stood in my way always got burnt, I loved to revenge passionately and Dele was certainly not a sacred cow.

The subsequent monday was my birthday, I was hoping there would be a suprise cake or party for me but no soul even wished me a happy birthday. Work went on as every other normal day.
I bent to open my drawer then I saw a parcel with a note attached to it:

I boss you because I want you to be the boss
I have admired you since the day I knew you
Work has to get better but don't ever try to change you.
Lots of love

I wept like a baby, that was the only gift I got that day.
Dele was not sacked and they are now proud parents of three kids.

Don't you just love to love? #winks.
Love everyone, everyday!